Column: Something About Nothing

I almost forgot to write my column this week.

I usually write my column the Wednesday before it is due and send it off on Thursday morning.

There are times when I frantically write it on Thursday morning because there was no inspiration on Wednesday. At times there is no inspiration on Thursday and usually you can tell it when you read the column on Monday.

In my earlier years I have never been accused of being at a loss for words. In fact I was a motor mouth. People would accuse me of talking too much. I did. I always seemed to have something to say or a new idea popping up.

This summer something changed. Perhaps it had to do with not feeling well or perhaps there is a time in life when all people stop and take time to examine what drives them.

I became a hermit this summer. I did not talk on the phone for a long period of time even with those I am close too. I did not have long conversations with people and I retreated. I thought perhaps this was a bad thing and I worried about it for awhile. Now I am slowly coming out of my cocoon, and I realize that time alone and retreat is not always a bad thing. Everyone needs a time to step back and rejuvenate after a hectic schedule.

I find myself not talking just to talk anymore. I find myself treasuring conversations that have meaning. I also find myself choosing more carefully what I do; of course, some of that could be the anxiety I am feeling while coming out of my cocoon.

Silence makes people uncomfortable. We have moments of silences during church services. Seconds seem like the longest time in the world during moments of silence. Have you ever chattered during conversations just so there would not be any silence?

Silence does not always have to be lonely. Why are we so afraid of silence?

There are conversations and there are conversations. Think about the conversations that you have and which ones stand out in your mind. Think about the conversations you have and think about how you feel about them afterwards.

I have had many conversations where I have rattled and rambled on just because the person I was talking to made me nervous. I would never remember what I said afterwards and I wondered what that person thought about me. I never felt good about those conversations.

Can you tell that this column is one of those “what am I going to write about” column days. Perhaps I am rambling in my writing just like I do with my talking.

The thought crossed my mind that I could have had an introductory question at the top of my column, a blank page and then a closing sentence. Would you have then heard the sound of silence? Would it have made you uncomfortable?

“’Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.” — Abraham Lincoln

 

Wells resident Julie Seedorf’s column appears every Monday. Send email to her at thecolumn@bevcomm.net.