The Nice Advice by Leah Albert

Dear Leah,

I have a young child 10 years old. Since she could speak, she has been asking for a cellphone. Well, it seems that way at least. My response has always been: “When you have a job and can pay the bill, you may have a cellphone.”

Sure, it’s a hard-headed approach. I grew up in a very hard working, middle-class family. Everything we had, we earned. Heck, I got my first job when I was 12! I have an issue with the sense of entitlement I see in a lot of our youth today. 

I’m beginning to see more and more that not having a communication device for her is a hindrance. She’s getting to an age where she is able and would like to stay home alone. However, to legally and safely do that, she needs to have access to a phone. It has been years since we’ve had a landline telephone in the house. If I had a way to safely monitor her, I would feel comfortable allowing her to walk or ride her bike to school. 

What to do?

Signed, Old School Mom in a New School World

 

Dear Mom,

I think it’s safe to say times have changed since we were kids. Gone are the days of riding bikes with no helmet, drinking from the hose or using the street lamps as our indicator it’s time to go home. Having a phone is a necessity, even for a child.

The benefit of being in communication with your child outweighs your argument. By no means am I saying you should hand over a brand new, state of the art piece of technology with no restrictions or responsibility. The device should still be earned. Perhaps your daughter could earn her phone every week, with chores or volunteer work. There are ways to continue to instill a sense of responsibility. You’re not caving in or enabling a sense of entitlement.

Think of it as a way to allow your child to gain her independence, safely. Most devices have GPS-tracking abilities and child-safety features. I’ve seen watches and other devices made specifically for kids. They are pretty cool! And almost indestructible. I know that’s an issue in our home. We were all born extremely clumsy.

Ask around. Talk to other parents. See what has worked for them, and why. It’s worth looking into, unless you want to have to watch your child’s every move for the next eight years. Take care!

Leah

 

Leah Albert is a fictitious character. She likes wine and writing. Don’t ask her to be a matchmaker. Do send your questions to Leah at theniceadviceleahalbert@gmail.com.