The Nice Advice, By Leah Albert

Dear Leah,

My best friend is a great guy. He is thoughtful and articulate. He goes out of his way for those he loves — even strangers. He was raised with terrific manners and always opens a door for a lady (or anyone, for that matter).

The last time we spoke, he told me he held a door for a woman, and she told him off! She said she didn’t need any help, that she was capable of opening her own doors and it should have been obvious that she wasn’t disabled — among other things.

I was totally shocked! My poor friend didn’t know what to say. I told him to just ignore what she said. Was there a polite comeback for him?

Signed, Slack-jawed and Stumped

Dear Stumped,

No, not unless he wanted to get into a hissing contest with a snake. You say your friend was raised to hold doors for ladies. Well, it seems he opened a door for a woman who wasn’t one. I’m so sorry to hear your friend had this experience.

We seem to live in a society these days of extremes. Perhaps this … person… took a simple act of kindness as a threat. Or presumption of weakness. It’s hard to fathom.

Have you ever met a person who can’t take a compliment? Instead of graciously accepting a kind word, and saying thank you, some choose to argue the point: No, no, my hair looks terrible. My work was sloppy. My behind looks huge in these jeans.

Please tell your friend not to give up on being kind, because anyone with manners would have said thank you and appreciated the gesture. I know I would have. Take care!

Leah

 

Leah Albert is a fictitious character. She likes wine and writing. Don’t ask her to be a matchmaker. Do send your questions to Leah at theniceadviceleahalbert@gmail.com.