It started as a cheesy pop psychology book.

Thursday, April 1, 1999

It started as a cheesy pop psychology book. Now it’s a cheesy pop psychology game.

If you were too lazy to read &uot;Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus,&uot; you’re in luck.

The &uot;Men are Mars, Women are from Venus&uot; board game has hit the shelves in time for holiday gift giving.

Nothing says &uot;I want to understand you honey, but I just don’t feel like talking about it like two grown adults&uot; quite like this game.

Dr. Gray has tried to narrow the gender gap by promoting the idea that the sexes are from different planets.

Or to paraphrase Dr. Gray, Martians and Venutians were happily in love and understood each other perfectly. Then they came to Earth and forgot they were from different planets. The unhappy aliens were doomed to a life of misunderstandings until Dr. Gray came along to explain all and remind them that they come completely different planets.

As a child, my intellectually insightful peers taught me that the male gender was indeed from a different planet. The lesson was as follows: &uot;Boys are from Jupiter, ‘cuz they’re stupider.&uot;

Oddly enough, I think my male counterparts believed the same thing about girls.

Even more odd is the fact that a grown man actually endorses the notion that men and women are from different planets.

Such silliness tends to place emphasis on the differences between men and women, driving them further apart.

It also assumes that these differences are purely innate.

All women live for shopping, and all men leave the toilet seat up. As victims of our biology, we can’t help it.

Thank goodness we now have a board game to tell us why we act that way.

By pitting the men (Martians) against the women (Venutians), the sexes can learn about the differences, while having great fun.

&uot;The game is a great way to talk about relationships in a casual setting,&uot; Dr. Gray says.

And what thought provoking questions they are.

&uot;Women find it most difficult to be a good…. a. mother, b. wife, c. daughter.&uot;

&uot;Men score the most points for… a. being on time, b. being early, c. calling when they’re running late.&uot;

I feel more enlightened already.

&uot;Starting on their respective planets, players answer questions about what they think, what they like and for what they wish,&uot; according to Mattel. The first team to make it back to Earth wins.

Personally, I predict a whole lot of fights arising from this game.

Thinking about groups, such as women and men, in terms of absolutes tends to aggravate the group that is being stereotyped.

Men hate to be called insensitive as much as women hate being labeled emotional.

But despite our ever so politically correct climate, it’s still acceptable to promote stereotypes between the sexes.

Rather than validating the stereotypes, men and women need to see their similarities.

It might also be helpful to recognize that the differences that may exist between a man and a women are differences that can be found between any two people, regardless of sex.

Another tip, if couples sincerely want to understand each, a board game is hardly the answer.