Aging leaves people recalling their dreams

Published 9:00 am Monday, October 27, 2008

We have been gay, going our way

Life has been beautiful, we have been young

After you’ve gone, life will go on

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Like an old song we have sung

When I grow too old to dream

I’ll have you to remember

When I grow too old to dream

Your love will live in my heart

So, kiss me my sweet

And so let us part

And when I grow too old to dream

That kiss will live in my heart

And when I grow too old to dream

That kiss will live in my heart

“When I Grow Too Old to Dream”

From the film “The Night Is Young” (1935)

(Sigmund Romberg / Oscar Hammerstein II)

I first heard this song when I was working as an activity assistant in a nursing home. I jotted down the name so I wouldn’t forget this song because I thought the words were so beautiful and they spoke to my heart. I put the piece of paper away and now 15 years later I found it again as I was de-cluttering my life. It was strange to find a piece of paper with a song that touched my heart so many years ago. I found the name of this song the same week that a friend of mine lost her husband. It was also a week I had been thinking about my future and about my past and being thankful for the many memories I have with my spouse.

I could not remember the words to the song. I could only remember that this song touched my heart so many years ago. I decided to take the time to look up the words and they so fit this week in my life.

This song was written in a time when the word gay meant happy and frivolous. Weren’t we all young and frivolous at one time? Didn’t we have dreams of love and romance and finding that one special person to share our life? For some that dream came true and for others no matter how that dream might have died there have to be some memories of being happy and frivolous with someone. That love might be the love of your life or a good friend or even your family.

I am older now. There must have been a reason that I found this piece of paper to remind me of this song. I do not want to grow too old to dream. But there are times that our dreams die. They shrivel up and sometimes so do we.

I have always been a dreamer. This song reminded me of my dreams. They reminded me of the stories my friend told me about finding and marrying her high school sweetheart later in her life.

When we are young we dream of what our life is going to be. At least I did and I know many of my friends did. We were young and we were happy and had such big plans for our life. And then our real lives happened. Our life may have been different then our dreams. When we were young we could and did create new dreams. Why do we forget to do that, as we get older? Do we think there is not enough time left to accomplish our dreams?

What matters is not accomplishing our dreams but the dreaming itself. Dreaming energizes. Dreaming gives us the hope of possibility. Sometimes those possibilities become reality. And if they don’t, perhaps one day another dream will be a reality.

In this week when a funeral disrupts our lives this song brought back thoughts of my youth. This song gave me thoughts of my friend and her dreams. I hope she does not quit dreaming either. If you are young and reading this, don’t regret your life, and no matter what don’t stop dreaming. If you are old and reading this, don’t let your dreams die with the memories. Every part of our life makes us who we are today..

And by the way, I’ve had many dreams that have not come true. I haven’t met Robert Redford. My attic is still an attic and not a writer’s retreat. I haven’t won the lottery. My car isn’t hot pink. A Wii hasn’t appeared in my Christmas Stocking. I am not a famous actress and I keep getting pink rejection slips from publishers. We don’t have world peace. I still dream I am a Baby Boomer. Wait, that dream came true. But I am not giving up. I have been young. Life has been beautiful. I have sung an old song. Love lives in my heart, so does that kiss by the way, but I will never be too old to dream. And neither will you!

Wells resident Julie Seedorf’s column appears every Monday. Send e-mail to her at thecolumn@bevcomm.net.