‘See a penny, pick it up and all the day you’ll have good luck.’

Published 9:55 am Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I came out of a convenience store the other day and saw a penny lying on the pavement.

I pick up pennies.

“See a penny, pick it up and all the day you’ll have good luck.”

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I think that finding and picking up a $20 bill brings even better luck.

I grew up being advised, “Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves,” “A penny saved is a penny earned,” and “Count your pennies.” Such counsel caused me to become a frugal person. A frugal person is a cheap one who has been to a seminar.

When I pick up a penny, there is usually someone nearby to give me that “Poor old Batt must be down on his luck. Maybe I’ll drop another penny on the ground after I buy my coffee and doughnut” look.

I pick up pennies. I can’t help myself. Some people say that they would lose money by taking the time to pick up a penny. I figure as long as I bend my knees properly and don’t injure my back, it’s worth my time to add a cent to the Batt fortune.

I bent over and picked up the penny. It’s good exercise and I get paid for it. Picking up an orphaned penny is better than a penny earned. A found penny is tax-free.

Once I pick up a penny, I have to decide what to do with the coin. I could put it in a penny loafer, but I don’t have a penny loafer to put it in. I’ve never had penny loafers. I’ve always been willing to loaf without pay.

I could pay someone a penny for his or her thoughts.

I could put it on the railroad track and flatten it.

I could use it for some body piercing jewelry. I have no body piercing, but I could keep the penny handy in case of a nail gun accident.

I could sell it to someone on eBay for a nickel.

I could toss it into a wishing well and wish I had the penny back.

I could use it as a payment to a creditor who had angered me.

I could play dice with the penny. I’d need five pennies to take the place of one die. I would start at one and then flip all five pennies. Heads would add one and tails would be zero.

I could frost the penny in the freezer and put it down my wife’s neck on a hot summer day to act as an emergency air conditioner.

I could use it as a replacement for a lost checker — making the head side a king.

I could glue it to the heel of my shoe and tap dance or send a podiatric Morse Code.

I could give the penny to a friend and then my luck would never end.

I could take it to the bank, deposit it and tell the teller there, “See, I do, too, have a job!”

I could use it to scratch off a lottery ticket if I ever buy one.

I could fill a sock with pennies and use it for self-defense.

I could play penny ante poker.

I could use it to measure the tread on my car’s tires. If I see “In God We Trust” above Lincoln’s head, it’s time for new tires.

I could place it on the grave of a loved one to let the deceased know that I am thinking of him or her.

I could flip it and make the penny my new financial adviser.

I could save it and give it to a trick-or-treater next Halloween. The disguised child would likely toss the penny on the ground and I could pick it up again.

I could use it to alter the pH of my soil.

I could use it for added weight on a kite’s tail.

I could place it over a doorway for good luck.

I could ask an older man what he used to be able to buy for a penny.

Or I could remember these words, “I found a penny today, just lying on the ground. But it’s not just a penny, this little coin I’ve found.

“Found pennies come from heaven, that’s what my grandpa told me. He said angels toss them down. Oh, how I loved that story.

“He said when an angel misses you, they toss a penny down. Sometimes just to cheer you up, to make a smile out of your frown.

“So do not pass by that penny, when you’re feeling blue. It may be a penny from heaven that an angel has tossed to you.”

That’s why I picked up that penny.

Hartland resident Al Batt’s columns appear every Wednesday and Sunday.