Things I Tell My Wife by Matt Knutson

“I’ll go with you to the first grocery store, but you’ll have to drop me off at home before this turns into a multi-store shopping trip extravaganza,” I told my wife as we scheduled our evening plans.

My statement was a compromise, as I’ve grown to hate grocery shopping. Because my very smart wife knows where the best deals are, grocery shopping often entails visiting several different stores to make sure we’re saving the most money as possible. It’s great for the billfold, but painful for my sanity.

There are several reasons why I dislike shopping for groceries. The food always seems priced higher than I imagined it last time, I never end up buying the healthy items I intend to purchase, and there is always someone in my way.

To put it simply, I wasn’t created for grocery shopping. My thought process goes something like this: Was milk really $4 last time? Do I really spend that much on milk every week? Maybe I’ll just drink water. No, it’s not healthy to cut out calcium, so I’ll still get the milk but feel slightly jaded every time I pour a glass from the gallon.

My thoughts may not be rational, as I certainly can afford to buy milk, but my thought process works this way with just about every purchase.

In addition to my ridiculous thought process, my over-considerate nature fills me with anxiety as I try to anticipate the many directions a mother and three children will be heading in as I approach with caution to grab some cereal.

Do I dodge left or right to avoid the little boy with goo-filled hands? Either way, I don’t like those odds.

I’ve discovered that since I’ve become an adult, I no longer have to do a lot of the tasks that make me feel uncomfortable. When you’re young, your parents encourage (maybe force) you to do activities you’d never voluntarily do. These shape who you are while allowing you to grow in new directions. Now that I’m making the plans (with the help of my wife, of course), I can pretty much cut out the discomfort.

This would of course be harder without Sera. Her trips to the grocery store certainly save me from insanity, but I suppose I could do the same without her via online shopping. The Internet has really allowed us to create a personal space that removes us from the humanness of this world.

We don’t need to leave our homes to shop or do much of anything because we have our own network already online. I’m now able to choose when I want to live uncomfortably, and to be honest, I’m not going to choose that too often.

The Internet has allowed us to create a world built specifically for us. While that’s wonderful in the sense that I can now easily find out all of the information on photography I’ve ever dreamed and can watch every episode of “Friends” on Netflix, it can be very isolating in another sense. I’m not exposed to other political or religious viewpoints unless I seek them out.

Is there another side to the story? Most people will never know. I feel like I’ve been enjoying my personally crafted world too much as of late. It’s time to re-enter the realm of uncomfortablity and see the world from a larger context.

I’m not sure if it is a New Year’s resolution, or something coincidentally timed with early January, but it is something I intend on improving upon in my life. At my young age, I’ve found myself pretty satisfied with where my life has taken me.

As Sera and I find ourselves enjoying our community and careers, I can’t help but wonder what’s next, and how we can continue to grow. Perhaps that’s the lifelong learning concept that was ingrained in me while attending and later working at Waldorf College.

My conclusion is to start living uncomfortably. By striving to live uncomfortably, I hope my wife and I find ourselves to be renewed, to fight off stagnation.

Will increasing my trips to the grocery store alter my worldview? Likely no, but the act of moving toward the uncomfortable in one area will hopefully spawn further growth.

Maybe I’ll find myself in a gym, or doing my wife’s laundry or a attending a loud and rowdy concert. Perhaps I’ll just end up with more groceries.

 

Rochester resident Matt Knutson is the communications and events director for United Way of Olmsted County.