My daughter and son-in-law recently graced us with a visit. Early on in the conversation my daughter said to me. “Now I don’t want you to take this wrong. “ What does one do when someone prefaces their statement with those words?

I stood up straight, braced myself and put on my “whatever you are going to say I won’t let it bother me face.” She says “I was going to bring you a gift. I received a free Instant Wrinkle Write Off Pen when I bought my Sephora and I thought I would give it to you.”

That was it? I got my back up and my brain worried and my tear ducts ready for a statement about a gift of a wrinkle remover write off pen? I started to laugh. I have never been particularly sensitive about my wrinkles. After all I feel I have earned every single one of my wrinkles. And now I was being given a gift so I could write off my wrinkles. Every single wrinkle I had earned through worry and happiness and sadness I could write off.

We seem to focus a great deal on wrinkle removers these days. We work hard and spend a lot of money trying to get rid of our wrinkles. There are over the counter wrinkle removers and creams, prescription lotions, facial exercises, Botox, injectable fillers, laser resurfacing, chemical peels and of course plastic surgery.

Apparently wrinkles develop because we laugh, frown, squint, sneer and make all kinds of facial expressions. Our skin wears out because we express ourselves through our facial features. I guess we could teach our children early on that the best way to avoid wrinkles is to be expressionless.

Is it possible to laugh without moving your face muscles? How about anger without using your face muscles? Try those emotions and see if you can do it without moving your face muscles. I would expect the person watching you would increase their wrinkles because they would be laughing so hard at you.

We all like to look our best but we seem to have a hard time accepting the natural aging process of our bodies especially our faces. Could it be that we have a hard time accepting getting older and that is why we fight our wrinkles? If we fight wrinkles we possibly do not have to accept our age. It is hard to look in the mirror and see someone on the outside that doesn’t look as young as you feel on the inside.

I know 30-year-olds that have a hard time accepting their age. They are 30! They are young and they are having a hard time with their age. What is so frightening about growing older even at 30?

Of course we have to look at the ads. Don’t forget about the commercial years ago of the older lady that stated “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.” And then there are the ads for dentures and hearing aides. How many times do you see young people in those ads? Let’s not forget about all the drug company ads that are aimed at the elderly. Have you seen the ads for bladder control, Alzheimer’s and electric wheelchairs? Let’s face it. A lot of advertising portrays older people as physically weak or incompetent. Watch those commercials and maybe that 30-year-old should be scared about getting older and developing wrinkles.

I prefer to think of getting older remembering Clara Peller. Remember her? She is the lady that at the age of 81 shouted “Where’s the beef?” in a Wendy’s commercial. That slogan and Clara became memorable. Clara had been a manicurist until she started her career in commercials at age 81. Despite her wrinkles, hearing loss and emphysema she became a household name. Clara knew how to enjoy her life, and I suspect she didn’t spend too much time worrying about wrinkles.

I also didn’t read about too much worrying about wrinkles by the centenarian’s, people who have lived to be 100 or longer as I was reading the book “The Blue Zones” by Dan Buttner. I could be wrong but I don’t remember any of them saying that worrying about their wrinkles and using all the wrinkle removers had helped them live a long life. But I can tell you that the pictures that I have seen of these people make me think that what they are doing is much more beneficial to keeping wrinkles away then all the creams in the world.

In an article by Dan Buttner in AARP this month it tells us that Icarians from the Greek isle Icaria don’t worry about time. Throwing out the watch lowers stress and reduces the risk of everything from arthritis to wrinkles. Is it possible for us to not worry about time?

We worry about wrinkles because we view aging as a downhill road. Our faces sag, our bodies sag and our attitude sags. I suspect Clara Peller didn’t have that attitude. Aging also brings wisdom, being able to laugh at yourself, and understanding all the wrinkle creams in the world can’t change who you are inside and your attitude about yourself. Those wrinkles on your face represent all the wrinkles you have had in your life. Those wrinkles represent joy, sorrow, anger, difficult and grateful times. Those wrinkles represent a life well lived.

So if you have a problem with wrinkles, iron them out in your clothes. Pretend those wrinkles are the wrinkles of life that you want to get rid of and the wrinkles on your face are the joy in your life that you have lived.

And yes, in spite of everything I said I am accepting the wrinkle remover pen from my daughter. After all I wouldn’t want to hurt her feelings by turning down her gift. And then I have to use the pen so if she checks she knows I appreciated her gift, but I’m not worried about wrinkles. I’m not, really I’m not! Really!

Wells resident Julie Seedorf’s column appears every Monday. Send e-mail to her at thecolumn@bevcomm.net or visit her blog at www.justalittlefluff.blogspot.com.