Gorge until you’re disgustingly satisfied

Published 8:38 am Monday, December 7, 2009

Angie: I am so full.

Mandy: Did you have a good Thanksgiving?

Angie: That’s a loaded question; which is also how I had my sweet potatoes.

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Mandy: You don’t like Thanksgiving?

Angie: It’s a holiday centered on eating…

Mandy: So, it’s your favorite holiday then.

Angie: Top 3, for sure.

Mandy: There should be more holidays about food.

Angie: Agreed. That’s why I made up my own. I celebrate Thanksmas at the beginning of December.

Mandy: Thanksmas?

Angie: I found between Thanksgiving and Christmas my stomach would shrink back to a normal food capacity limit. It made both holidays a bad day to be my pants. By adding in a filler holiday I could hit peak eating performance.

Mandy: I honestly don’t know how to respond.

Angie: S’okay. What you’re feeling is called awe. Just go with it, it’ll hurt less.

Mandy: I don’t think that’s it, though my stomach does feel upset.

Angie: Don’t act like you don’t gorge too. That’s why they made gluttony one of the seven deadly sins. Only the fun stuff makes that list.

Mandy: You’re right. Reading is my overindulgence. I will read anything and everything I can get my hands on.

Angie: You’re a book slattern.

Mandy: Add a glutton for punishment on too since I keep doing this column.

Angie: You love it.

Mandy: That remains to be seen.

Angie: Playing hard to get will only make me try more.

Mandy: You’re dense.

Angie: Are you calling me fat?

“I Was Told There’d Be Cake” by Sloane Crosley

Angie: This book is not just about cakes but tarts, sushi and cookies all make it in there too.

Mandy: “I Was Told There’d Be Cake” is a compilation of short stories similar to David Sedaris.

Angie: Crosley grew up in the ’80s and ’90s so her stories about the Oregon Trail are like peeking into the past and laughing at little 12-year-old me. She deserves it though; she was a brat who thought her frosted pink Guess jeans made her cooler than you. Thank God present day me is less obnoxious and narcissistic.

Mandy: Riiiight.

Angie: I did say less. Besides, Crosley also writes about being in her high school friend’s wedding, evil bosses, vegetarianism and volunteering.

Mandy: Subjects all deserving of a good comeuppance.

Angie: No one vomits in the book.

Mandy: Let’s just agree it’s a great book, especially for the 25-35- year-old reader.

Angie: Agreed, but seriously, no gets sick.

“Eat, Pray, Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert

Angie: Elizabeth Gilbert was a depressed and lonely woman who spent many nights crying on her bathroom floor. She was in a terrible marriage and went through an ugly divorce.

Mandy: After another failed relationship she decided to travel for a year. A book advance paid for her journey and “Eat, Pray, Love” is what came out of the experience.

Angie: The goal of her worldly expedition was to gain some perspective which she captures in this spiritual memoir.

Mandy: Her first stop was Italy to indulge her senses, then India to heal her spirit through meditation, and finally Bali to gain balance.

Angie: In the spirit of full disclosure, we should tell you that most people I have talked with feel there is a lull in the middle section on meditation.

Mandy: I thought this column was based on truthiness?

Angie: Totally, I was overcome with humanity for a moment. This book does that to me. I’m better now.

Mandy: It is rather uplifting. And now these three remain: “Eat, Pray, Love.”

Angie: The greatest of these is eat.

To read the rest of the Bookends column, including “Things You Don’t Want To Hear at Thanksgiving”, go to albertleatribune.com and click on blogs. Then look for the title “Bookends” to get additional book recommendations, post comments, and suggest books to be reviewed. You can also email Angie and Amanda at bookendscolumn@gmail.com.