The Rev. James Young, Christ Episcopal Church

The Lord brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm, with a terrifying display of power, and with signs and wonders; and he brought us into this place and gave us this land, a land flowing with milk and honey. So now I bring the first of the fruit of the ground that you, O Lord, have given me.’ You shall set it down before the Lord your God and bow down before the Lord your God. Then you, together with the Levites and the aliens who reside among you, shall celebrate with all the bounty that the Lord your God has given to you and to your house. (Deuteronomy 26:8-11)

Have you ever noticed how proficient, and even enthusiastic we tend to be when it comes to complaining about poor service in a business? I must admit to including myself in this number. After a bad experience at a restaurant, or with auto service or in a retail store, are we not ready to proclaim our feelings of hurt and anger to the world with missionary zeal? Anyone and everyone will hear of it, and with each retelling the narrative becomes more dramatic. What about the opposite experience? Do we go around with the same energy to recount a positive experience? Not very often. In general, our culture seems much better prepared to complain than to express gratitude.

Sadly, the same phenomenon happens in varying ways in our praying. Whether it is in personal prayer or in church on a Sunday morning, our list of concerns for ourselves and others tends to be quite lengthy — and that’s not a bad thing! But, I’ve noticed that when it comes to expressing our thanks and gratitude to our Creator, the list can often be considerably shorter. I humbly suggest that like many activities in our lives, the act of expressing gratitude is a habit that can only be cultivated and improved with practice.

Notice, that I have not used the word thanksgiving. That is intentional, particularly at this time of the year when our minds go to the holiday with a capital T. The Thanksgiving holiday is admittedly a day set aside for giving thanks, but it is also loaded with subjective meaning and rituals that don’t always give much opportunity for actually expressing gratitude. There are many distractions such as making sure that relatives and other guests get there if the weather is bad. Then there is all the shopping and food preparation and that added pressure of making everything on the table look special. And, of course, there is the menu of parades and football games on TV. In a rather strange and ironic way, this leaves little real time for quiet reflection on the day set aside for that very purpose. Could it be that we need to start much, much sooner?

As we all know, any skill or habit will improve with practice, and the same could be said of the habit of being thankful. Try this simple exercise for establishing the habit of grateful living, which is very loosely adapted from the Examen, one of the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola. First, get an inexpensive three by five inch pocket sized spiral notebook. Then every day, write an entry with the date and three reasons for which you are grateful. It’s that simple. At first, the ideas may not come as easily. This is the result of simply not being in the habit of expressing gratitude on a daily basis. Keep at it, because it takes a minimum of three weeks of practice to establish a positive habit. Then occasionally look over your entries for the past month, and you will be pleasantly surprised at the depth and breadth of the reasons for you to be grateful. As the habit of being thankful deepens and matures, I assure you that your perspective on life will change. Not only will it make the holiday more fruitful and fulfilling, it will bring an inner peace and sense of joy that lasts throughout the entire year.