Column: The Nice Advice, By Leah Albert

Question: I’m graduating high school this year and am really torn up. Some of my friends are leaving to go to school in other states and some are already moving in together and settling down. I’m not sure what I want to do with my life and all this change is exciting but scary at the same time. How do I manage?
— In Flux

 

Dear In Flux,

You really are at a pivotal time in your life right now — entering the real world! You have your whole life ahead of you and there are so many decisions to be made. I think what can make many of us hesitate is the fear we will make the wrong decision. There is only one way to get around this: understand you will make the wrong decision — or at least you will feel you have.

Every experience is a learning experience. If you’re able to stay mindful of what is happening and how you and others feel about it, you will grow quite a bit and you will be able to chart a better course for your future.

The greatest lesson I have learned in life is that of humility. We often feel we are in this life on our own, but we’re not. We are one thread in a magnificent tapestry — our decisions affect the lives of others around us and their decisions affect us.

We succeed in humility when we ask for help and give help when we see it is needed.

On the other hand, it may be the change that is unnerving you. No matter which decision you make, your world will change. This can be the most challenging thing to realize, and the most painful.

Your best friend may no longer be your best friend in 10 years. You may not live in Hawaii like you planned or find the dream job.

But you will learn you can make new friends who are the perfect fit for what you need in your life at that moment, you can find beauty in the place you do live and you will benefit from every job you have, even if it’s just from the paycheck you receive.

We tend to focus on what we don’t have, when we can benefit greatly every day from appreciating what we do have.

 

Dear reader,

Life is too short to be fearful of the unknown and I am sure many happy surprises await you along the path you will take. There will inevitably be challenges, but they are what make the good times even better.

I have found what helps me the most when I feel anxious about the future is to focus on being thankful for the opportunities I’ve had in my life.

To quote Irving Berlin: “If you’re worried and you can’t sleep just count your blessings instead of sheep. And you’ll fall asleep counting your blessings.”

I wish for you to have a full and challenging life with many adventures!

 

Leah Albert is a fictitious character. She likes wine and writing. Don’t ask her to be a matchmaker. Do send your questions to Leah at theniceadviceleahalbert@gmail.com.