“We’ve still got plenty of time to make it to the hospital,” I gently told Sera as we rushed through the city. “Let’s try doing some of your breathing exercises.”

This week we wrapped up our prenatal course in our traditional fashion: hurrying to the hospital’s classroom in a last-minute effort to arrive on time while trying to remember what we were taught last week. Ideally we’d be more prepared for these classes, but there’s something to be said for practicing the rush to the hospital when labor begins. Hopefully on that miraculous day we won’t be following last year’s recipient of the Slow Driver’s Award. Right now that seems like an unfortunate trend.

All that aside, we did learn a lot by attending these prenatal courses over the last four weeks. I’m sure most hospitals offer them, and I encourage first-time parents to fit it in their schedule before their little one(s) arrive. Being in a room with other pregnant women and their support people brought with it an atmosphere of openness and honesty amidst genuine learning opportunities — something I think all future parents could benefit from.

What did we learn from our prenatal classes? Quite a bit! It turns out these types of classes don’t always start on time, which makes sense because most babies don’t arrive on time. I don’t recall the exact statistic, but you’re more than likely not going to actually deliver your baby on the due date. In fact, the trend shows that first-time parents deliver a little early. This doesn’t bode well for our tendency to be a little late. I assume most first-time parents would appreciate a few extra days to prepare for the baby, so the trend that these babies like to come early is not one I’m a fan of. (Do you hear that baby girl? Stay in the oven until the timer goes off. I’ll be sure to play a special ringtone for you on my phone alarm to let you know when we’re all set.)

One thing Sera learned in the span of our four weeks is that there is no such thing as too many bathroom breaks. I received “the look” multiple times, indicating this section better wrap up soon because our little girl had decided her toy of choice for the night was my wife’s bladder.

While baby girl got to practice kicking, we spent dedicated time each night practicing different methods of keeping calm, laboring positions, breathing techniques and how I can be a supportive coach. The most valuable takeaway from our instructor: Pregnant women may enjoy your jokes during early labor, but when she starts transitioning into active labor, it’s best to shut down the laugh factory. I don’t know why Sera wouldn’t prefer the opportunity to laugh between contractions, but I’m not brave enough to find out either. Other things spouses and support people shouldn’t do include: reminding her how many hours she’s been in labor, mentioning you want to take a quick break and sharing that the contractions must not be that bad because she’s not screaming.

There were also a lot of specifics that I was taught to do, but I’ll let you take the course for those crucial details. Perhaps the most reassuring piece of information we were reminded of was that this is a normal process, women are doing it all over the world right at this very moment, and there’s a team of people going through this with you. Our pregnancy likely isn’t anything never-before-seen, so as special as we know our baby girl will be, it’s also important to remember that this is a very natural process.

We concluded our final class on Monday with a tour of the birth center and left with the confidence that only knowledge can instill in someone. There may be several more weeks to go, but we’re officially as prepared as we can be for labor and all of the unexpected journeys that may come along with it. Unfortunately, as Sera lamented when we got home, we didn’t even receive a certificate of achievement for completing the prenatal course. Lucky for her, I’ve now added a labor certificate to our packing list of things to bring to the hospital. After all, our daughter will be getting a birth certificate, and she won’t have to do all that pushing.

 

Rochester resident Matt Knutson is the communications and events director for United Way of Olmsted County.