Julie Seedorf: It takes work to learn the art of patience

Published 9:08 am Monday, December 5, 2016

Wells resident Julie Seedorf’s column appears every Monday. Send email to her at hermionyvidaliabooks@gmail.com.

Patience is not always my strong suit, although I feel as I age I learn new lessons about the art of waiting.

I have learned that if you are in a hurry and you are carrying a computer down steps, hurry and anxiety over getting the job done might land you in the operating room with steel pins being put in your leg to heal your breaks. I have learned that hurrying to pay your bills online at the last minute might induce mistakes that take longer to correct than the original task. I learned taking shortcuts because of impatience is never a good idea and results in consequences you can’t imagine. I can go on, but you get my drift.

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This past week we had the privilege  of attending the St. Olaf College Christmas Festival in Northfield. It is a beautiful concert with talented young men and women. Events during the evening reminded me of the value of having patience, not letting anything disrupt the peaceful vibes during the season of Christmas.

Who would think a Christmas festival would bring to mind patience? As I watched and listened to the beautiful music, I marveled at the talent and dedication of the young people in the choir and orchestra. It was a two-hour concert, and never once did any of the choir pull out music. It was all memorized, and if there was a note that was off anywhere in the choir you didn’t hear it. These young men and women had to have patience to finesse their memory and music skills and so did the wonderful conductors who taught these young people. They all worked hard so we could enjoy the concert.

Many times during the evening the word patience came to mind. Have you ever waited in line for the bathroom at a venue? I’m sorry but if you’re a  man you probably don’t know what I am talking about. There never seems to be a line for the men. Well, it was no different at the concert and the lines were long. I have learned long ago it doesn’t pay to be impatient and crabby because what are your options, going back to your seat without visiting the restroom and praying you don’t laugh or sneeze, or you wait in line and hope you get through it before the concert starts so you can feel comfortable during the evening. I always meet some very nice women in line, and we always have a fun conversation. The best conversation I heard that night was the suggestion the college should close some of the men’s bathrooms on concert night and give the bathrooms to the women. If you had been there you would have heard the laughter all the way down the hall and the agreement of all the women thinking it was a good idea.

Driving out of the parking lot after the concert the word patience again reared it’s beautiful head. Some people haven’t learned and didn’t have any. If you have ever been in a parking lot after any concert you know the mess it can be. We were at the far end of the lot and saw we wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon even with the campus people directing traffic. Even though we had a 1 1/2-hour drive home and it was late, we chose to sit patiently in our van and listen to music. Some were not so patient. They backed their car out of the stall, almost hitting other cars to wedge in so they could just sit and wait some more. Then, when we were all on a two-way road leading out, we again were waiting patiently. One car decided he should drive in the oncoming lane to get to the front and pass all of the cars in line. Once he jumped out, another couple of cars decided to follow him. There was only one problem with that scenario: They were driving in the wrong lane with other cars leaving the concert trying to attempt to drive toward us in their lane. Impatience can cause accidents.

We had all attended a beautiful, relaxing Christmas concert. It took everyone away from the stress of the world for two hours. Yet the minute some left they were right back in to their impatient life. I wondered why some were in such a hurry at 10:30 at night. What could be so important they couldn’t let go of the world and be patient and wait for their deliverance out of traffic.

Waiting is a given these days. We wait in lines. We wait on the phone. We wait for something to come in the mail. We wait for medical test news. We are always waiting for something, and we can choose to wait patiently or to stress ourselves and others out more because of the way we react to the situations that slow us down.

Many people also wait for a kind word from someone we love or a stranger. We wait for a smile or a nod or to be noticed so we feel we matter. Christmas baubles and music may sooth us for a few moments, but it takes work to learn the art of patience. If we can’t be patient with ourselves, how can we be patient and share that kind word or that smile with others?

Make the season count past the quiet moments of music and Christmas cheer. Be patient with yourself and then pass on a kind word or a smile, and maybe you will pass on patience that will add to the light of the world.