Things I Tell My Wife by Matt Knutson

“Why is she attracted to every outlet in this home?” I asked my wife as we whisked Gracelyn away from yet another attempt to electrocute herself. Apparently 9-month-olds are magnetically pulled toward outlets, and there’s nothing you can do to fight the magnetism. We’re striving for safety over here, but we may need a team far more skilled than these parents to prevent this little one from rebelling.

For those worrying, we do have those little plastic covers that are suppose to prevent our little one from actually sticking her finger in the outlet. I’m guessing unlike most parents, we’ve gone through several iterations of these protective covers. Gracelyn has a particular talent at removing them from the outlets. Currently, we have a completely transparent version that seems to have finally stalled her intrepid efforts.

This little girl is now old enough to know exactly what she wants. Sometimes that’s great, as we can easily make her a bottle or find one of her favorite toys and she’ll be happy. Other times, it’s clear she wants to do exactly what we’ve told her not to do. Playing with the electric outlets is a great example. Gracelyn has this particular face she’ll make, one of maniacal joy, just after she has determined to risk it all and play with a nearby outlet. Her eyes widen, her mouth smirks and she darts off with an unnaturally fast crawl across the room toward trouble. Mustering strength previously unknown, Gracelyn pulls herself up using only the wall and looks back at me, daring me to tell her no. I take the dare, of course, and my daughter’s response is typically to turn away from me and ignore my pleas. Is this what parenting is really like?

As our daughter finds her independence, it’s often met with hesitation. The other day she intentionally crawled out of our sight — down the hallway and into her room. I’m not sure what she was after, but upon realizing she was leaving our gaze, she sat just out of view, teetering her head back and forth to see us whenever we called for her. This new version of peekaboo incorporated the same smirk and chuckle that was previously paired with the electrical outlet hunt. We’re clearly entering into a new stage of parenthood.

It’s easy for us to look at Gracelyn’s explorations and see that there’s so much she doesn’t know. At 9 months old, I figure that’s OK. In the back of my head though, I must think: Why would she willingly attempt to go over so many obstacles we place in her path just to stick her finger in an electric socket? Who would choose to do that when we have musical instruments, brightly colored blocks, exciting stories, and more, all at the ready for her to play with?

I guess at the crux of my thought is wondering why people choose to do things that aren’t good for them. We see this all the time; people knowingly or unknowingly making the wrong decision. Everyone knows smoking can cause lung cancer, but plenty of people still smoke. How many hours has it been since you’ve seen someone fail to signal when driving? Even not eating healthy or exercising aren’t good, but a good chunk of us ignore the principles we learned in our health and wellness classes growing up.

Sometimes it takes a little bit of a shock to our system to start doing the things we know we should be doing and stopping the things we shouldn’t be doing. I don’t think there’s a ton of logic behind why, but it’s the truth of the matter. Have you ever almost been in a car accident because someone failed to signal? I bet you used your signal religiously after that incident. If only we could learn from others’ mistakes easier than we learn from ours.

As Sera and I continue to learn this parenting gig, I hope we’re able to firmly entrench in Gracelyn’s brain that the electrical outlets around our home are not to be played with before she learns from her mistake. Maybe there’s someone in your life that you can help teach a similar lesson to before it’s too late.

Rochester resident Matt Knutson is the communications and events director for United Way of Olmsted County.